Footie: UPDATE!

call off the search! footie is safe and sound. my kitties were naughty today and left me a surprise under the bed, but in the process of dealing with that, i found my missing footie. i guess it snuck off behind the bed when i dumped the basket two weeks ago.

this day will go down in history. screw jesus...today footie came back from the dead.

CAPTION CONTEST #2

since the last one was so popular (and hilarious pour moi), i give you the next caption contest.

very few people actually look UP while walking around town - and not that i blame you. diverting one's gaze leaves one at the mercy of any number of terrible dangers: pigeons, hobos, born-again christians. but, were you to scan the skies, you'd see this:



really, shoes? why shoes? and they're not just at my apartment. oh no, they're all over town, all tossed over telephone wire or power cables. is this part of some niche sub-culture? hazing ritual? an excuse to get a new pair of converse?

my offering: hamilton's holiday decorating budget hits an all-time low.

CAPTION CONTEST #1: WINNERS!

in keeping with the theme of xmas season, there are two categories of caption contest winners: naughty and nice!

Naughty
#1: Jessica: X-mas party game #324: Who's in my mouth?
#2: Kelly: And here we have Santa demonstrating what he wants for Christmas.
#3: Deevulge: Santa had to pull some tricks out of his sack to avoid going over budget this year...

runner-up: Bailey: "Hey, where my "ho's" at?"

Nice
#1: Maja: "Santa and the elves have decided to change their policy on those who have been naughty, instead of merely crossing you off the list, Santa now has the option to devour your soul."
#2: addicted: LOST....one red mitten,indentical to this one only thumb reversed. REWARD!!!
#3: Steve: Santa Claus says: "Yep, that's definately a party lizard"

runner-up: Sean: Santa meets the Telekenetic Prankster Elf: "Where'd my ice cream cone go?"

to all the winners: expect a grande sumatra in the new year, and thanks for playing!

CAPTION CONTEST: UPDATE!

i'm 'pert-near' finished my presentations and crap now, so i'll be looking into the business of picking winners very shortly. i suppose there should be a prize. i also suppose it should NOT be the holiday knick-knack. that thing is obscene.

i'll keep you all posted as things progress...

serena and the search for the stray sock

too much alliteration? i wasn't sure.

okay, so, it was laundry night, and i forced myself about my business as i always do...so, lazily. when i finally hauled all the clothes back upstairs, folded, hung, sorted and stacked, i noticed...an aberation. see, this never happens - since moving out, i have never lost a sock. i mean, sure, my MOM'S dryer eats socks, but i thought i was finally safe. apartment dryers have finer things to munch - like, lingerie and suspenders, rugs and loofas. really, why would they want MY socks?

anyway, i donned my sleuthing cap. wait, is it 'donned' or 'doffed'? and can you do it to a cap?

*one quick dictionary perusal later*

okay, so i DONNED my cap, and looked for a watson to my holmes. kai was asleep, so i was accompanied by my trusty fugly mug. by the way, how come nobody is named sherlock anymore? are parents too overawed by the heritage of the name? too hubristic? well, i guess you don't see too many kids named jesus either, do you?

fugly mug in hand, i decided to retrace my steps. (haha, i retraced my steps looking for a missing footie! that's awesome! okay, fine, don't laugh. i don't even care.) i patted down sleeves, i felt up pantlegs, i rooted through the underwear drawer and shook out the pillow cases. no footie. i checked the elevators. yes, both of them. i finally went back to the laundry room. i checked the washers, i checked the dryer, i searched the floor and scanned the shelves. no footie. all i found were some bodice rippers, with scintillating titles like 'ravished' and 'warprize', and some lint. i pocketed the lint for later and moved on.

i returned to the apartment, did another sweep, but to no avail. then i looked up 'avail'. yes, that is the proper context.

this is not over. not while i still breathe. footie, i WILL find you.

*strains of agonized violins*

FIN...for now!