a linguistic break-through!
scrabblesquirrel and i were procrastinating on msn last week, trying to avoid doing french, as we often do, when we had a break-through. we've answered the question many have pondered since the beginning of time. no, not 'what is the meaning of life?'...much bigger. much more elusive. a question of biblical proportions:
what the FUCK is wrong with the french???
seriously. they pronounce perhaps half of each word contained in the typical french sentence. it's terribly confusing for non-native speakers. not that i generally attribute much original or consequential thought to the french, but on the off-chance that they DO produce something significant, i'd like to catch it. why do they neglect articulation and enunciation? i've pondered this for far too long.
and so i give you...
2/27/2005, 5:00:29 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
haha, i love french syntax - "is it that you have need of some butter for to do the baking of the cake of the birthday?"
2/27/2005, 5:00:36 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
*snort*
2/27/2005, 5:01:01 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
seriously, i love it
2/27/2005, 5:01:16 PM
Jessica: Mireille! Ne couchez pas avec Pierre! Il est un LOSER!
hahaha yeah it is amusing
2/27/2005, 5:01:24 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
latin - as few words as possible
2/27/2005, 5:01:30 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
french - as many words as possible
2/27/2005, 5:01:35 PM
Jessica: Mireille! Ne couchez pas avec Pierre! Il est un LOSER!
yup
2/27/2005, 5:01:37 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
more so than greek, i think
2/27/2005, 5:01:45 PM
Jessica: Mireille! Ne couchez pas avec Pierre! Il est un LOSER!
yeah i think so
2/27/2005, 5:01:53 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
no wonder it takes the french forever to say anything
2/27/2005, 5:02:04 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
it would take me forever too
2/27/2005, 5:02:19 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
which is why they slur and pronounce only 1/3 of the words!
2/27/2005, 5:02:25 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
we've figured it out!!!
2/27/2005, 5:02:25 PM
Jessica: Mireille! Ne couchez pas avec Pierre! Il est un LOSER!
*snort*
2/27/2005, 5:02:28 PM
Jessica: Mireille! Ne couchez pas avec Pierre! Il est un LOSER!
hahaha
2/27/2005, 5:02:30 PM
Jessica: Mireille! Ne couchez pas avec Pierre! Il est un LOSER!
blog entry!
2/27/2005, 5:02:31 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
oh my god!
2/27/2005, 5:02:34 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
YES!
2/27/2005, 5:02:45 PM
serena: ...memories in paraphrase...
i've discovered the secret of french!
2/27/2005, 5:02:58 PM
Jessica: Mireille! Ne couchez pas avec Pierre! Il est un LOSER!
congratulations
2/27/2005, 5:03:03 PM
Jessica: Mireille! Ne couchez pas avec Pierre! Il est un LOSER!
i'm proud of you
~*~*~
...so as you can see, this is why the french are incomprehensible. too many words! they simply haven't the time to utter all of the redundant words in a typical french sentence. this is why they slur and ellide like a frat boy at a kegger. honestly, what's the point of an inflected language if you aren't going to pronounce the significant morphemes?
i propose a linguistic revolution. we discard unnecessary particles and prepositions...so, all of them. we introduce the case system - inflectional morphemes for nouns. failing a radical paradigm institution, DEFINITELY the genitive. there. we've reduced french syntax by two-thirds. toss in a bit of crisp articulation, and you have a comprehensible language. actually...
...you have german.
le sigh.
posted by dizzyweasel @ 1:37 AM
5 comments
5 Comments:
Viva la Serena!!! Yo
heehee!
hmmm...i should probably make this point now, before anyone gets their knickers in a twist: the humour is more self-deprecating than prejudicial. i've transferred my intense hatred of french over to german. apparently i can only like one modern language at a time.
Yes, I remember this night well. So well in fact that with the help of babelfish I translated a version of what transpired into dutch, then japanese, and then back to english. So without further ado, I give you the dutch/japanese/english version of the linguistic break-through:
In one time hour 2 as for attempt of the girl you endeavor because of secret of French rear. They possessed many conversations, thought of elisie, and made the half word which is used neglected. 1 night, they possessed the discontinuance finally. French that that 1 Tsuga perhaps it should go away is formed from this methodological many pronoun which entirely is not possible. The French slander pronounces only word or one half those why, that. Secret, it solves that!Yes, 'tis true. One really must look out for flaring cakes. Which damage.
I've been looking for the secret of French rear.
it's derrière. and i think my french prof is single...i'll put in a good word for you. she looks kinky!
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